I don’t know if you’re reading this article now because you want information, or the title made you curious. Either way, thank you for being here. The title is not clickbait or something catchy to sell you something else.
Now you may be thinking, what in the firetruck are you writing an article on this subject? What are you even going on about? Well, here’s the bottom line, after 46 years in the Martial arts/defensive tactics community. I have seen a ton and learned even more. Now I qualify my statement because I know reading the title to this article sounds Ludacris, I do not mean the actor or rapper. ( tho I am a fan of his music and acting, alas, I digress)
Spit in Your Face and Flee!
The point of spitting in your attacker’s face is to do only one thing: create opportunity. Spitting can be used to create a chance to run. Spitting can also create an opportunity to use a combative tactic. Bottom line is that spitting is a distraction.
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Now, for some of you, spitting, especially if you dip( chewing tobacco), will not be that big of a deal; however, there are some of you reading this who have never spat in your entire life. Now, how will I, the author, be able to teach you, the reader, how to spit in written form? I am not even going to attempt that Ominous project. ( I think if we’re being honest, almost every human being is capable of this task)
So the first thing you need to do is, if you don’t know how to start, start practicing (sidenote). I would probably do that, practicing alone and in an area where people are not going to be near you. It’s funny because it’s true.
Now, if you are uncomfortable with the idea of actually forming something phlegmy ( yes, Mr and Mrs spellcheck, I know that’s not a real word) in your mouth to expel ( perhaps you might prefer let out or discharge, yes, I googled that $*!t )into the face of your attacker, if for any reason you can’t or just don’t like the option of spitting, perhaps too will like my other suggestion which is to have water and or a liquid beverage( I’m not sure if we have any other kind) in your hand so that you can take a sip and spit that into their face, problem averted!
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Create an Opportunity
As I have stated above, the purpose of this tactic is, and that’s all it is, a tactic for distraction. Because here’s something I know very well. When someone is in a foul mood, screaming yelling, obscenities, and saying they wish to kill you, when you spit in their face, and with a bit of luck will actually go into their mouth as they’re speaking and yelling yes, I know that’s a gross and descriptive visual, hey it’s a Fight Club Article what do you expect, their ( the aggressor) brain stops what they’re doing and says “what the firetruck did this mofo just do?”
“Did this blankety blank blank (putting cuss words here would not go over well with management, plus I’m really working on my cussing) just spit in my face?” Now it is during this millisecond when said bad guy’s brain is running into overtime digesting the information it’s receiving that you either A – Runaway, out of harm’s way AKA striking distance or B – kick them in the balls,(let’s go with genitalia), palm heel strike( look for previous Fight Club articles on how to throw a palm heel strike) in the face, get off the X, etc.
You see, here’s a straight-up honest fact: getting spit on is disgusting. Ok, yes, there’s a small percentage of the population that when you spit on their face, they smile, and they do like the movies. They wipe it off their face, and then they put it in their mouth, which is extremely disgusting, and while it is gross in the film and gross in real life, it does not happen with most of the population.
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Get Over it
We are conditioned from a minimal age that when some type of phlegm(let’s be real, any fluid, get your mind out of the gutter, y’all )hits our face, we literally stop what we’re doing to take the time to clean it off.
I wanna make sure yet again I’m crystal clear, this is not some Mr. Miyagi cool guy self-defense five-finger death touch technique, it’s. I’m putting it in capital letters just a TACTIC, a distraction, an opportunity to get away or create space and time, a chance to go to another tactic(like escaping ) or to deploy an actual defensive type technique.
The funny part about spitting in someone’s face is when you look at it from the bad guy’s perspective, our brain can register the micro movements of our face, far, far faster than we think, so when you’re about to, and this is where audio would be a lot more impressive. Make that noise, hawk tuah yes just like hawk tuah girl( I’m not sure if the name is trademarked or not..) funny, I never even thought of her before this very second writing this part of the article.
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Anyways, squirrel, moving on .. your brain will register and protect itself against that spit if given the opportunity, which means the bad person‘s brain is going to cause them to go away from getting any phlegmy fluid, snotty fluid, you get the idea, into their face or eyes.
Ok, kids, let’s break this down like a fraction.
1- when confronted try to get some distance( please understand this may be a mute point as it might be to late for that)
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2- spit fluid (phlegm or other liquid) at the face/mouth of a bad person
3- If you can run away, now would be a great time to do exactly that
4- If running is not a choice, kick or knee in the genitalia and push them away from you. Then run away ( go to www.readyroom.net to learn how to give a kick to the genitalia )
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Now I have to say the most challenging part about any confrontation, regardless of whether it’s verbal or physical, is finding the courage to respond. This spitting tactic is a simple and effective way to deal with the possibility of violence entering your life and escaping with little to no harm to you.
Is it gross, yes…more for them than for you.
Let’s move On….
Will it work? Yes, given that you commit to what I’ve written above. As I’ve written in the past, dealing with violence is a challenge for those who didn’t grow up with it. Let’s be honest, if you have fought most of your childhood and adolescence, I’m pretty sure you’re good with getting in someone’s face and squaring off. However, if you read those last few sentences and said Umm, heck no, that’s not me, then my friend’s ” spit and run is a pretty darn good solution for you.
Suppose you check out other Skillset Fight Club articles. In that case, I’m very confident you can find some educational information on other physical options, techniques and tactics and tools, This is perhaps a good time to remind you that no matter how peaceful you live your life, it’s just not realistic to think you won’t get a visit from violence, whether that’s mental, verbal, emotional or physical violenc at some point in your life. ( unless you choose not to leave your place of residence. Not sure that’s what most of society would agree on is actually living, I’m just sayin)
A Couple of Reminders
1-Please keep an eye on your surroundings, it’s tacticool to say “situational awareness”, the most overused and abused statement in the defensive tactics/martial arts community. The bottom line is, get off your phone and actually pay close attention to what’s going on around you and those you are spending time with.
2- It’s not too late for you to learn some form of martial art or defensive tactics system. You get in good shape, and it truly improves your confidence. ( mental, physical, and emotional)
3- There is always someone bigger, stronger, tougher… so if the fan hits the feces, hit effectively, run.
4- Typically, it’s the weakest appearing person that gets attacked; the first two suggestions alter how you, the reader, will be viewed. To truly #beanightmare4badguys starts with becoming someone who looks like you’ll be a pain in the a$$ to mess with. (an excellent reason to get mentally and physically in “fighting” shape)
As always I am hopeful that you don’t ever need to deploy or use any type of offensive or defensive tactic or technique, however I’m also optimistic that should you have to, that you my friend can and will effectively deploy said tactics and techniques so you can get home safely, if said bad person has nightmares after messing with you than that’s a nice bonus.
Keep your head on a swivel. ( a nice lil cool guy tactically motivated saying) Happy spitting
